maverickmommaadventures

 To say this year is a festive season like no other is a massive understatement! Without a pandemic the festive period for separated families can be a time of doom and gloom. It is with this in mind I decided to release my current book " The Post-Divorce Recovery Kit" just before Christmas.  In 2014 I published " The Divorce Toolbox" which focused more on the legal proceedings around divorce, aimed at people who were at the decision-making stage of divorce or going through court proceedings. My current book looks more closely at ways of supporting children through the process. I have included a chapter about " The difficult firsts" where I have shared my story about Christmas away from my daughter for the first time.  As the festive period continues there is now the pandemic to factor in. If there are still difficulty with the non-resident parent, it will be even harder to make decisions and reach an agreement. I have also included a section about work...

No doubt one of the first changes to be spotted on my blog is the name change. It is very indicative of the path I'm on now. As I said in my last post I am returning to my blog in my forties,on a different adventure in life. When I first started the blog I was getting my head around the whole multi tasking, working single mother dilemma. The reason for Maverick in the blog title  is because  that seems to be how my path has been. Never mind the society ideal picture of becoming a doctor and marrying one within the same culture, my path has been beyond conventional and very unapologetically maverick. I have decided it is time to embrace this and work with it rather than against it. this is a message I would like to convey to anyone who is reading this blog. During this lock down I have like a lot of people  turned to some philosophical  quotes and self help books. Something that I read about recently is learning to let go of that perfect picture and to see situations ...

I have been contemplating starting my blog again for a while now.  When the  lock down was announced I set myself a to do list of both work related goals and practical ones, but also some fun, creative goals. Among them was starting my blog again. This post has been drafted and edited several times in the last few weeks as other things take over. Homeschooling a pre-teen and keeping on top of my own day job has delayed the plan very slightly.  The last time I blogged  was at the beginning of 2017. This lock down has certainly brought out a more reflective side in me. In. I would say it is an invaluable time to take stock and reflect on life in general. We can really look at where we were to where we are now to where we would like to be. There is probably a reason why I have started my blog again during lock down.  Looking back at some of the blog archives, I remember what a different place I was back then.  It may seem like my blog has been quiet for th...

I mentioned in my last post what an adventure 2016 was for me. Among the toxins that were in my life ,on the creative side I’ve actually surprised myself at how much I achieved. This is a positive step towards starting the new year. It is easy to feel disheartened about the resolutions that never came into play the previous year, to the point that we do not bother making any the following year. I’ve learnt we should always look for the positives and not dwell on the negatives. It is actually the better level of success with my writing that made me realise that this is the path I would like to follow professionally and that the end of certain chapters in my life were a sign that writing is my new chapter. Here is a list (where possible with pictures) of some of my 2016 writing highlights: De Monfort university bookshop stocked one of my books, the anthology I wrote for young adults. I was invited to Moat Community College to conduct a writing workshop as part of ...

I’m aware it's been ages since I posted on here but many changes have taken place in my life recently,fortunately changes that have given me the opportunity to pursue my writing passion. One of my news years resolutions is to blog more.This is the time of year when people plan for the new year to come but  also look back on the year that is about to end.Amongst the trials and tribulations of 2016  I did fulfil some resolutions I made for 2016.  I finally got my sixth book Assam Adventures published and along the way I’ve had adventures of my own. I’ve always felt that reading and writing are escapism where you can go enter any world you desire. During a dark period in my life I choose to go back to a happy place,the time I spent in Assam as a child. This is an issue I touched on in the book.  Whenever my parents said we were going to India for a few weeks what I loved most was not just missing school but a break from the bullies. When my siblings and I got th...

I’m having a Narnia feeling at the moment as over the weekend with my family I watched a concert that transported me to another universe. For the fourth time in my life I watched the Tabla maestro Ustad Zakir Hussain perform for the Alchemy Festival at Festival Hall London. Every time I watch Zakirji’s concerts no two performances are ever the same. However it was not just Zakirji’s performance that blew me away but also humility which is a rare quality to find. It really upsets me when I come across people who have only ever written one poem or sang one song and they give themselves the title of legend, when I’m in the company of a true legend like Zakirji I find this term is used too loosely. Zakirji does not even like to call himself a legend, this was reflected in how he introduced the young Sitar Maestro Niladri Kumar saying “It is not Niladri Kumar accompanying Zakir Hussain it is the other way round”. This encouragement for the young maestro was very heartening to see. ...

For anyone in the literary field World Book Day is an event we all look forward to, a day dedicated to books and writing, celebrating some of the literary  greats and gaining new insights. This year along with my writer friend Leah Osborne I had the honour of being invited as a guest author at Moat Community College. I read a poem and short story from my latest collection Embarrassing Siblings,Playground Taunts and other Growing Pains. I tried to deliver the message of never giving up on dreams even if peers,teachers,etc tell you otherwise. It was heartening to find the year nine pupils engaged in the exercises we set them. Leah and I also had to undertake these exercises by writing a story on the spot. Altogether I found this day very gratifying and it was very humbling to hear comments about how the children benefited from an educational point of view. The second group of year nines requested I write a story about them, which I will do. I did however promise a poem an...

I can really empathise with this time of year when young people are taking mock exams, it can really lay down routes for the future. It is not just the exams but support and encouragement they received that shapes futures too. In my last book I touched on topics such as teachers putting children down and mocking their dreams. This adds further stress to the whole process. If a child is told they can’t go to university or they should aim lower they will believe it and it can shape lives in a negative way. I feel very strongly about this issue which is why I wrote my book and I am taking it further with another project which is launching a home tutoring business with a difference. Not only will I be giving academic support to to people taking GCSE’s and A levels in English and Humanities subjects, I will also be offering mentoring and career guidance. During the mentoring and career guidance process I will help children turn around their negative thinking and help them to  make d...

To continue from the last post, my weekend as a Runner on the 1448 Design Team was beyond awesome. The theme for the first night was “ I’ve got a bad feeling about this.” On the first day I didn’t get the full 1448 experience due to juggling this with a day job but I definitely gained invaluable experience from the time I spent. My lunch hour was spent making poo tentacles and cutting material for neckerchiefs. When I returned in the evening it was a long but fun night with a happy and hardworking team that made every moment an amazing experience. We were on our feet all night running around but we had a lot of laughter in the process. Between running around I caught a glimpse of some of the acts and wow what amazing talents from the writers,actors and directors. I got in at 2am and caught a few hours sleep ready for the next day. Even with less sleep once I walked into The Y the energy of all the people around me woke me up. The theme for Saturday was “no pain no gain.” I felt on...

I'm really excited about my latest creative endeavour as a Runner for 1448 Leicester. The concept of 1448 was brought to the Y Theatre  Leicester from Seattle by husband and wife creative duo Amy and Bob Christer. The concept is to write and perform fourteen plays in forty eight  hours. The theme is drawn out of a hat and the writers have till very early the next morning to submit their finished scripts for the actors,directors designers etc to put together, then perform  over two evenings. I attended the launch event this evening and the creative energy is infectious. It is both fun with a discipline element to it, as there are tight time constraints. This is a brilliant opportunity for local artistes in the community to showcase their talents. Tonight  I met some amazing people from different walks of life and am looking forward to what the weekend has in store for us all. This is my first involvement with this festival but it has been running...

Following the interview  last Sunday I then was invited to make another radio appearance, this time on the Graham Torrington Late Night love Show  on Monday night. I had to pinch myself with this one as I grew up listening to that show. I've always been a fan so that phone call with the invite to appear on the show was a dream come true. This time the discussion was around is it wrong to celebrate divorce? My view on this was, being released from an unhappy marriage is like being released from a jail sentence and getting that decree absolute makes it final  putting a green light on being able to move forward with your life. When Graham Torrington asked me how I felt when I got mine, for me it was just a formality as I knew the marriage ended. We then talked about can it be seen as a failure. To this I responded it takes guts to leave an unhappy marriage and referring to my interview the previous night, life is for living not existing. Graham then asked...

It was an honour to take part in Arshia Riyaz’s  show Midlands Masala again last  weekend, some very stimulating insights on the subject matter including  is nine months too early to end a marriage, are people giving up too easily and with the increase in celebrity divorces are they setting  a bad example? I was amused when Arshia introduced me as the author of The Divorce Toolbox and am I someone who helps people to get divorced. To this I  replied that  I guide them through the process. When Arshia asked me my own view about Imran Khan and Reham Khans divorce within a few months of marriage I felt we need to look at the route of the problems, which is society, not just our Asian community but society in general puts pressure on being married . There is still a stigma attached with courting or living together. A perfect example is recently when Chukka Ummna went for labour leadership he was harshly criticised for having a girlfriend in his thirties...

Exactly this time last year when I published my self help book "The Divorce Toolbox" I was also invited on a radio show to not only talk about the book but also discuss the topic "why is divorce on the increase in Asian society." Following Imran Khan's recent announcement to divorce after just nine months of marriage the same radio show invited  me to take part in a discussion asking the question "is nine months too early to end  a marriage and how long should we give a marriage before making that decision? There will be other guests taking part in the discussion and listeners are are very welcome to phone in and  give their input. This is a very thought provoking topic that can be approached from several angles with a variety of insights. As someone who is divorced and written a book on it I certainly have many of my own views on this and look forward to sharing them with listeners. The show is BBC West Millands 95.6 a show called Midlands Masala with...

This time of year really takes me back! When the A level and GCSE results come out and people move onto pastures new. There is the aftermath of the grilling you get. I have touched on this issue at great length in my new book as it affected my childhood. Even if you feel your results are good enough for your path, society has a different view. The first social event you attend in the Asian community calender can be like a results day in itself. The comparison shopping of who got all A stars, who got into Oxford, who's doing medicine etc. Looking back on all this now I have finally realised this is not even half the battle of life. I still reiterate maybe someone did get more A stars than you but what have they contributed to society? Being an Oxford or Cambridge graduate does not make you a better person. Just because someone's life may appear perfect these appearances can be deceptive. In my collection my poem "Results Day" and story  "Behind the Scenes...

As we are well into the summer holidays now I am still amazed at the year Nishka and I have had. There have been highs and lows,darkness and light. In reflection the following poem came to me during a bus journey about a week ago; We Got Through! Got through the year, not without a tear. Outwardly a smile, inside a trial. Would the next phone call lead to a fall? Trying to keep track watching my back. Digging in the knife, cutting into life. Constant pacing heart,mind,body racing. Amongst the low, a lot to show. Moments of pride, no need to hide. My little angel growing inner goodness showing. Refusal to demise sparkle in the eyes. With every ounce of mettle fighting each battle. Not giving in, when luck wore thin.

Last  weekend along with three other lovely ladies I completed the Race for Life and raised money for a very worthwhile charity. I’m so happy I made it to the 10K finishing line in a total of one hour and thirty eight minutes. Taking part in this event has given me so much on many levels. As I said in the previous post I feel inspired to know survivors of the illness and it is with this pride I took part in the event. I have become a lot fitter from taking part in the Race for Life and had fun along the way. The last seven years took its toll on my own health and I feel by training for an event like this it has kick started a healthy fitness regime that I intend to maintain even though the race is over. If anyone is struggling for motivation to get fit and trying to juggle it with other commitments I strongly feel training for a charitable event is the way to go. It actually forces you to go for that run and not just talk about it. I found myself fitting training in around sch...

During the long gap I had from blogging I mentioned that I have been keeping very busy. Amongst the books and usual mummy mania etc I have also been training for the Race for Life which I will be taking part in this Sunday 5th July at Victoria Park Leicester at 2pm. Cancer Research is a charity I strongly believe in and feel proud to be supporting the event. However the cancer victims I know are actually survivors of the illness and still live to tell the tale which I find very inspiring and it gives hope. I have an aunt who fought the disease and survived, she proved to be stronger than the cancer itself. This same strength was passed onto me in my dark times and I consider the women I know as true role models, by not giving up. The mentality they took was basically to tell the cancer to **** off.  I hope anyone reading this post will find this very heartening. At the weekend I plan to do 10K combination of jogging and walking with some lovely ladies who I have met on th...